This is the Re, re, re, remake - Clash of the Titans (Spoilers throughout)

This review will contain spoilers throughout

I'll be upfront about this I will compare this to the 1981 version.  I adore the 1981 film so I may not have started out in an unbiased state.  I know the 1981 film isn't great but it's a childhood fave and has all the charm I need.

The cast list for this film is pretty good.  Plenty of great actors.  Most of the cast did a pretty good job.  It's just that they didn't have a great script to work with.  The exception in the cast was no surprise to me.  The charisma vacuum that is Sam Worthington.  He really should stick to playing someone the director doesn't want me to empathise with.  I cannot understand why he keeps getting leading roles.  Perseus has a number 2 cut.  Everyone else has long hair, why?  Perseus speaks in an Aussie accent?  That's just plain wrong. Sam would be wise not to share a screen with an actor of Postlethwaite's calibre again

I know that when they remake a film/film a book/etc they will change the story somewhat.  This I rarely like but if it makes sense fair enough, needs must.  The original film didn't stick to the original legends.  What they failed in this film was to portray the Gods and their everyday effect on the human race.  We saw them destruct, we didn't see them add anything.  They were one note performances, if that.  They brought Danny Huston in to play Poseidon, blink and you miss him. Dr Bashir (as Mr Siddig will forever be known) didn't get more than one line.  Without an understanding of the Gods and their overseeing/meddling with the human race this story is empty.

You bring Ralph Fiennes in?  Great, he's got some pretty fine acting chops.  So he'll play Hades, the baddy.  He's been banished from Olympus.  He appears and disappears in a puff of smoke.  Has a human do his dirty work.  Speaks in a whisper, admit it his second name is Voldemort.  For heaven's sake it was embarrassing.

The Clash of the Titans, Titans seemingly being Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter and Alien.  Now I know films in the fantasy genre often use similar apects.  If a film has carved it's place you may not even notice it, if it feels in place it doesn't bother you.  Here it grated on me to the point of distraction.  During their journey I was looking for a Hobbit.  When they tamed a monster scorpion and saddled it I wanted to scream Oliphant.  Nothing rang true.

I think the writer or director was trying to make a point somewhere along the line.  I'm not sure what that point was though.  It just felt like I was being hammered with something.  When Calibas gasped to Perseus 'don't become like them' as he was slain it was sooooooooo out of place.  Calibas supposedly hated Perseus.  Why would he care if he took his place on Olympus.  Did the writer want to tell me something with Perseus' hatred of the Gods?  They changed the story so that Hades killed his mother.  

Why did we need a love interest other than Andromeda?  Io would have made a good addition had she been watching over Perseus rather than getting him into the sack.  Was the lone, very human Perseus at the end supposed to tell me something?

Now my final point is the cardinal sin in this remake.  One of the best parts of the original was Athena's mechanical owl Bubo.  Yes I can hear you all screaming that it was a crappy R2 copy but I love it.  When Perseus picked it up (what looked like the original prop) I was happy, for a split-second.  When he was told to leave it I was gutted but assumed he had it in his back pack.  He didn't.  How dare the writers dis' a part of the original whilst they were busy relieving themselves all over it's memory.

I had my childhood raped and was forced to sit and watch it on the big screen.  It's only bonus was that it was relatively short in today's terms.

1 out of 5 pawprints.