BritFilm - Four Lions (Spoilers hidden)

I deliberately avoided as much information on this film as I could before seeing it.  Knowing that there was a comedy about suicide bombers, by master of controversy Chris Morris was all I knew.  It certainly sounded like a very dodgy subject.  I decided to avoid the fuss made and go see it with an open mind.

From the moment it starts off you can see it is firmly a comedy.  Not a film with dark humour or situations that lend a sense of amusement.  This is a full on comedy.  The recent film it reminded me of most was In the Loop.  Even though the humour was mainly from different sources.  The main character, Omar was reminiscent of Malcom Tucker in that he's confident that he's right and the imbeciles around him are just complicating things.

As a comedy it is very, very funny.  I haven't laughed that much since I saw In the Loop.  Apparently a film that shares a couple of writers with Four Lions.  The jokes and amusing, ridiculous situations flow thick and fast.  I'm sure I missed a few things on the first watch.  It's rare I actually laugh out loud in the cinema as I find this rather irritating.  Neither I nor my fellow cinema goers could help it.  Luckily we were laughing at scenes that were actually funny.  A rarity.

I suppose the major question is - Is it right to find amusement in such a dark, nasty subject.  I'm not deep or intelligent enough to answer that question.  I can tell you that I felt at least awkward for laughing at such a film, if not actually a little shamed.  I do however think that such subjects should not be off-limits to writers.  As I've avoided as much information about this film and it's effects I'm unsure yet what, if any, real protests have been made. I haven't seen much more of Chris Morris' work.  His other controversial stuff passed me by.  I do suspect that he would enjoy the fact that his audience felt uncomfortable laughing at this film.

This film was very well written from a comedy viewpoint.  The cast did that script proud.  I think we'll see more of Riz Ahmed.  What I've seen him in he's always done well in his role.  The rest of the cast had to play mainly buffoons.  Which they did very well.  There were no roles for a vain actor in this film.

SPOILERS BELOW (rollover to view)

The one thing I found very uncomfortable in the film was the inclusion of Omar's son.  Those scenes were hard for me to watch.  The brainwashing of a child in such a manner wasn't nice to say the least.  I also found it unbelievable that he wouldn't hide his plans better from his son.  Who could easily slip-up in school, in front of an adult.

The one scene I didn't think fitted the film was the scene of Omar's brother obviously about to be tortured.  This seemed too much of a statement on government practice in this area.  The statement didn't fit with the rest of the film.

END OF SPOILERS

I would say to see this film before you judge it.  It is hilarious but yes it's also dubious subject matter.

I won't even try and consider how I would feel about this film if I had lost someone in a suicide bombing.  I imagine I may not be able to see the funny side.  It's release would probably make me very angry.  It's this that makes me a little shamed that I found it so funny.

3.5 pawprints out of 5

BritFilm - The Disappearance of Alice Creed (no spoilers)

I knew virtually nothing of this film.  I knew it was about a kidnap and starred Eddie Marsan and Gemma Arterton.  The deal maker was Eddie Marsan.  He is always great.  I also wanted to see Gemma Arterton in a non-fantasy role.  Supporting a British film is always a bonus too.  Which is never easy as British fare seems to disappear from our cinemas pretty bloody quickly.


The film starts out pretty damn quietly.  There is virtually no dialogue in the first scenes.  These scenes portray two guys setting up to carry out a kidnapping.  Giving particular attention to soundproofing and the prevention of any forensic evidence being found.  They mean business, are extremely well prepared and have obviously been planning this for a while.

Once the kidnap has occurred the film takes a very dark turn.  It doesn't pull any punches and depicts what must be done to protect the kidnappers, keep their victim secure and their identities secret.  Some of these scenes are difficult to watch especially if you're a woman.

This film doesn't have your standard heist-type storyline.  It has the odd twist and turn to add intrigue to the drama.  It's a very tense film, not exactly a pleasant watch but a must-see.  I was satisfied by the ending too.  I'm not telling you any more of the plot.  Go see this film in your cinema, if not rent the DVD.

What really makes this film is the calibre of the cast.  Eddie Marsan is his usual fantastic self.  I've always liked Arterton in interviews and was worried she may drop the ball in this role.  My worries were totally unfounded.  She was excellent.  I completely believed her terror.  The humiliation and subjugation of her character must have been immmensely difficult to film.  If I were to award a best actress award this year, I'm pretty sure it would go to her.  I don't think the markings from her bindings were make-up.  I think that girl suffered in the making of this film.  The big surprise for me was Martin Compston.  An actor whose films I want to see more of.  I'd never heard of him before this film.  To me he quietly stole the show.  His was the character who grew more and more as the film went on.  His performance was perfect.

4.5 pawprints out of 5.

Turn off your computer and go see it now!

Iron Man 2 - Solid or a flop? (spoiler free)

I wasn't over-excited to see this film.  I thoroughly enjoyed the first one, a fun film with lots of bangs and flashes.  I wasn't sure I wanted to see it all again. I seem to prefer origin movies to their sequels.  I think filmmakers dump all the character exposition into the origin film.  Filling the second with another enemy to provide bigger and better explosions.

I have never been a comic book fan so I'll judge this film as a film that's a sequel to a film.  I know of nothing before the first film.

The cast doesn't bring any worries.  Sam Worthington is nowhere to be seen thank the Lord.  Robert Downey Jr did a sterling job in the first and I expected similar here.  I really didn't like his character in this film.  I think this was the desired effect though.  He'd lost any charm he had and was just a smug, arrogant git.  Not great really as disliking the main character lost me most of my emotional involvement with the film.  Sam Rockwell gave a great showing in his role.  Totally and utterly predictable but that was only to be expected with such a character in such a film.  Gwyneth Paltrow gave a pretty good performance.  I just have little respect for her character.  She should just tell her boss to piss off and go work somewhere less stressful.  She gets a lot less than she puts into that relationship.  A bit sappy really.  Don Cheadle's character is very similar.  I couldn't see what Tony Stark had to make those close to him so emasculated and a tad pathetic.  Mickey Rourke was great as his character.  One of the best roles in the film.  I didn't like the way the story panned out near the end but that wasn't Rourke's fault at all.  Scarlett Johanssen played my favourite role in the film.  I don't think I understand her character properly yet.  I'm hoping we see more of her.  She definitely played the least obvious character in the whole film.  Samuel L Jackson was used perfectly.  Just enough to make him interesting.  Little enough not to make us want more.

Overall I thought the story was a little too obvious in places.  Most of the characters were paint by numbers types.  Tony Stark needs to be a little more likable if they make another.  He just needed a slap in this one.  I found him completely unsympathetic, even with what he was suffering.  The scene on the Monaco circuit was just totally ridiculous.  Yes, I know I was watching a comic story but it just felt ridiculous.  As did the usual against all odds climactic final scene.

It was enjoyable though.  It was fun.  It would have been much more fun had it been 40 minutes shorter.  Please filmmakers contain yourselves when it comes to running time.  It shouldn't be a relief to get out of the cinema.  A shorter run time would maybe have me watching this again.  Maybe we could get 'cinema-goers cut' editions of films.  Trimmed down so they're better paced.

Marvel, it's a lovely idea to get a teaser for your next release.  Just don't make me sit through 5 minutes of credits for 10 seconds, it's arrogant and bloody annoying.  please just put them on Youtube.

3 out of 5 pawprints.

Centurion - Marshall's Period Piece.

I was pretty excited about this film.  Neil Marshall is one my favourite directors and Michael Fassbender on of my favourite actors.

I liked the way the opening credits were done.  Broad sweeping words on matching vistas.  Giving you a great vision of how harsh the terrain the film would take place on actually is.

After the first scene though things started to go downhill for me.  Dominic West playing Dominic West with a bucketful of bluster thrown in really didn't do it for me.  Neither did the Cockney accents of his Roman soldiers, a la Saruman's Urak Hai.  One of my pet peeves in period films is the use of modern accents to tell us someone's personality/character.  I don't need to view everything in it's correct language and enunciation.  I just don't want strong modern accents thrown in.

I'm afraid this film made me think Neil Marshall should stick to modern day set films.  Many will probably disagree.  To me this film gained nothing from it's period setting.  It was too modern day laddish.  I can't really explain what I mean here as I'm sure the Romans were laddish too.  This just felt a little too Guy Ritchie for the 2nd Century.  This was what ultimately took me out of the film.

The cast were mostly very good.  Fassbender I suspect would be good in Crossroads if he was cast.  David Morrissey played yet another blinder.  Solid dependable co-star who doesn't need to chew up the scenery.  As was Liam Cunningham.  Olga Kurylenko played her part very well.  That she was mute definitely added to her character.  If looks could kill though, she'd leave a trail of death with her eyes only.  I felt Dominic West overplayed his boisterous, 'I'm one of you my soldiers' role.  Brian Blessed type acting that doesn't suit him.  he just looks false.  Noel Clarke seemed to play his usual streetwise lad about London.  Again that didn't fit the setting for me. Axelle Carolyn will be one I'll keep an eye out for in the future.  The camera loves her and she held her own in her scenes.

Towards the end the film was a little predictable in places.  But nothing I'll lose sleep over.  I really wanted to enjoy this film.  It was the first time I've felt a little let down by Marshall.  Maybe I'm being a little harsh, I just didn't enjoy this film like I did his others. At least he had the sense to keep it short.  None of this trendy 2 hours+ I keep having to suffer with other filmamkers.  I'm hoping he returns to modern day or at least recent history with his next project.  He's still one of my favourites, he just has a slight blot on his record.

2.5 pawprints out of 5

Matt Smith's Dream Guest Star on Doctor Who

I recently found a new podcast courtesy of the @BlogtorWho Twitter feed, Meet the Filmmaker.

http://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/meet-the-filmmaker/id301899522  It's a series of interviews recorded at Apple stores.  The one I'd downloaded was Matt Smith, Karen Gillan and Stephen Moffat in New York.  An appearance before the first episode of the new series aired in the US.

They were asked about the array of excellence on the show in the guest stars this season.  Far too many good British actors to mention.  The bit that got me squealing was Matt Smith describing his dream guest star -

"If I could pick anyone, I don't know if you guys will know him, but I would pick... He was a footballer and he's French and he's called Eric Cantona."  

I knew Matt Smith was a nice guy.  I just didn't know what fabulous taste he had in dream guest stars.  Mr Moffat if you make this happen I will die happy, no more than happy.  Too ecstatic for the limitations of language.

The Surreal World of Pickle Shopping

Being back on calorie limiting lifestyle, I'm not the merriest of folk right now.  There are silver linings to every cloud though.

Whilst hunting around for low-calorie snacks I've nearly emptied my pickle jar.  So off it was to add some pickles to my online shopping basket.  A fridge is not complete without a jar of good quality pickled onions.  Good quality pickled onions, unfortunately, are getting harder and harder to find.  I like them large and I like them in spicy vinegar.  Not those pathetic soggy Silverskin imposters.  My current favourites are Sainsbury's in Hot & Spicy Vinegar.  Very tasty, with plenty of crunch.

As I wasn't shopping at Sainsbury's I was in uncharted waters.  I decided to have a browse and pick whatever looked tastiest.  First thing I came across was......

Is it April 1st I asked myself, no.  Could this be a leftover from April Fools' Day that hasn't been removed.  Oh no, they have their own website, http://www.pickleodeon.co.uk/  They were swiftly added to my basket!  Along with some Waitrose Spiced Pickled Onions and Balsamic Onions.  Now when these arrive I will update and review these preserved root vegetables.

Getting back to Barry.  I have always had the utmost respect for the man.  He is my favourite reviewer of films.  His autobiography was very entertaining and well, he comes across as an all 'round decent guy.  http://www.pickleodeon.co.uk/ claims that these onion are Hot & Spicy and Crunchy.  If these claims are true I will be on Cloud 9 (ramming my pickle fork into a jar).

He states that he never intended to sell these pickles but was convinced by a friend wowed by their quality.  Well just look at that jar above.  I have never seen a cooler jar.  The clapperboard on the label, referenced on the lid also.  Calling your website 'Pickleodeon'.  Doesn't it just give you a little grin?  I just hope I haven't hyped up these pickles too much for me to enjoy them at their fullest....  Those peppercorns peeping out of the bottom of the jar give me confidence though :-)

This is the Re, re, re, remake - Clash of the Titans (Spoilers throughout)

This review will contain spoilers throughout

I'll be upfront about this I will compare this to the 1981 version.  I adore the 1981 film so I may not have started out in an unbiased state.  I know the 1981 film isn't great but it's a childhood fave and has all the charm I need.

The cast list for this film is pretty good.  Plenty of great actors.  Most of the cast did a pretty good job.  It's just that they didn't have a great script to work with.  The exception in the cast was no surprise to me.  The charisma vacuum that is Sam Worthington.  He really should stick to playing someone the director doesn't want me to empathise with.  I cannot understand why he keeps getting leading roles.  Perseus has a number 2 cut.  Everyone else has long hair, why?  Perseus speaks in an Aussie accent?  That's just plain wrong. Sam would be wise not to share a screen with an actor of Postlethwaite's calibre again

I know that when they remake a film/film a book/etc they will change the story somewhat.  This I rarely like but if it makes sense fair enough, needs must.  The original film didn't stick to the original legends.  What they failed in this film was to portray the Gods and their everyday effect on the human race.  We saw them destruct, we didn't see them add anything.  They were one note performances, if that.  They brought Danny Huston in to play Poseidon, blink and you miss him. Dr Bashir (as Mr Siddig will forever be known) didn't get more than one line.  Without an understanding of the Gods and their overseeing/meddling with the human race this story is empty.

You bring Ralph Fiennes in?  Great, he's got some pretty fine acting chops.  So he'll play Hades, the baddy.  He's been banished from Olympus.  He appears and disappears in a puff of smoke.  Has a human do his dirty work.  Speaks in a whisper, admit it his second name is Voldemort.  For heaven's sake it was embarrassing.

The Clash of the Titans, Titans seemingly being Lord of the Rings, Harry Potter and Alien.  Now I know films in the fantasy genre often use similar apects.  If a film has carved it's place you may not even notice it, if it feels in place it doesn't bother you.  Here it grated on me to the point of distraction.  During their journey I was looking for a Hobbit.  When they tamed a monster scorpion and saddled it I wanted to scream Oliphant.  Nothing rang true.

I think the writer or director was trying to make a point somewhere along the line.  I'm not sure what that point was though.  It just felt like I was being hammered with something.  When Calibas gasped to Perseus 'don't become like them' as he was slain it was sooooooooo out of place.  Calibas supposedly hated Perseus.  Why would he care if he took his place on Olympus.  Did the writer want to tell me something with Perseus' hatred of the Gods?  They changed the story so that Hades killed his mother.  

Why did we need a love interest other than Andromeda?  Io would have made a good addition had she been watching over Perseus rather than getting him into the sack.  Was the lone, very human Perseus at the end supposed to tell me something?

Now my final point is the cardinal sin in this remake.  One of the best parts of the original was Athena's mechanical owl Bubo.  Yes I can hear you all screaming that it was a crappy R2 copy but I love it.  When Perseus picked it up (what looked like the original prop) I was happy, for a split-second.  When he was told to leave it I was gutted but assumed he had it in his back pack.  He didn't.  How dare the writers dis' a part of the original whilst they were busy relieving themselves all over it's memory.

I had my childhood raped and was forced to sit and watch it on the big screen.  It's only bonus was that it was relatively short in today's terms.

1 out of 5 pawprints.